The incurable and progressive shadow that Parkinson’s Disease casts over my life looms larger than ever, as a thief – a particularly greedy one. It is a thief that is as determined as it is sinister, salivating at the prospect of stealing the most intimate of possessions. It yearns to snatch my core. It wants all of me, my identity. Defending against this ever-present bandit takes so much of my strength and resources it leaves me wondering if it would be easier to let it have its way.
It would be easier.
But it would be wrong. Immoral even.
A complete defence system isn’t yet an available reality, and as mine is poked and prodded it appears useless, relinquishing to the thief control of my movements, my voice, my serenity, my sanity. It feeds hungrily on my anxieties and fears. Yet, there is a small vault hidden somewhere deep within, that remains secure, impenetrable. There is seemingly room for a single occupant in this vault – my resilience. My determination to bounce back, to withstand trials and suffering, to not give up. If this and nothing else stays safe and secure, I will win.
The quest to protect this treasure is too large to undertake alone, so like Frodo Baggins I need a team, a fellowship.
The goalposts may shift. The whole ballgame may well change, but by protecting this vault I can adapt – defining and redefining my purpose, leaving this thief of a disease discontent and longing for more. And so…
…After reflecting with gratitude, I can push onward with resilience.
I’m bouncing back from:
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My life-changing diagnosis.
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Life with copious quantities of medication.
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Awake Brain Surgery.
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Fear, self-doubt, anger, pain.
So Here Lies My 2nd Challenge To You (and Me)…
How often do we recognise the struggles we endure? Whether triumphing or continuing to battle, what is it that you have faced with steely determination and chosen not to give up? To not let yourself be beaten. To bounce back.
Please take a moment to acknowledge your struggles, and afford yourself a grin where a grimace might usually belong. A slap on the back for maintaining your sense of purpose or morality that fuels your resilience.
Now, look forward.
What is it that requires realignment? What is it that you can bounce back from now? Most importantly who will you give the precious opportunity that is ‘supporting you’ to?